After the Storm

I climbed out of the window
as he shoved her down the hall.
I walked the streets of my hometown
as he tore the phone from off the wall.
It's 2 a.m. and I'm 13. What is it that takes me here?
To walk along in silence while the others scream in fear?

I walked about for five years then ran for five years more.
Running from the violence inside my wounded soul.
I sat on swings in old school yards waiting for a friend.
A mom or dad
or
just someone
that had some time to spend.

I slept in others' houses and sometimes in the park.
In light I'd go to school, but learned mostly from the dark.
No one came and I got tired of waiting for a friend.
I started running wild hoping life would end.

At 25 I overdosed on purpose -- just to die.
But others came and rescued me.
Sometimes, still, I wonder why.

All the while he stayed the same, predictably a beast.
I took what I saw best of him and headed my life east.

One day, amidst my madness, came the desperate cry.
Your fathers in the hospital.
We think that he will die.

Something called inside me
to 'go be there by his side'

I flew out West. His brain was gone. The tumor had his head.
Soon this beast that beat on us was going to be dead.

Then something deep, way deep inside, called for me to look.
It scared me hard to hear this voice so much so that I shook.

'See, he's not a beast at all. Just a crumpled worn out man..'

I took some time to take this in.
Then took his curled hand.

I touched every single finger that he used to bruise my limbs.
In a tragic quiet moment I prayed just once, for him.

I said, "Oh God, can I care at all if this guy right here would die?
Could you care for him as he is now?
Will you come be at his side?"

This all happened years ago.
I was dumb of God back then.
But today I see more clearly,
so these words to you I send.

I didn't know that God was God and sometimes he'll use strife
He reaches out a long long time to save a wrecked up life

I didn't know that Jesus died to set right all the wrong.
I didn't know to reach for Him.
Nor did my dad -- who's gone.

This prayer's for you that read this now
if you're wondering how to care,
Just reach for Christ, His hands are strong,
and soft from many tears.

He'll meet you like a father
a brother or a friend.
And teach you how to find the way
to trust in love again.

anonymous
*i*

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Prepared with Love, Compassion, & Much Prayer, bible devotional